Reddit user seeks advice about first Mother’s Day: His wife wants to stay home with baby, families not pleased

Experts weigh in on whether it is fair to expect a couple to follow family tradition

Mother’s Day is a special occasion celebrated by Americans around the country, to honor and thank mothers for all that they do. 

Mother’s Day 2023 is Sunday, May 14th, and many are making their family plans for the annual day. 

A Reddit user sought advice after his wife recently became a new mom and decided that she wanted to spend Mother’s Day with just her husband and her baby. 

REDDIT MOM ADMITS TO FEELING ‘HUGELY TRIGGERED’ BY HER OWN CHILD AS SHE TRIED ‘GENTLE PARENTING’

Reddit user "El_Yanomami" took to the "Am I the A--hole" (AITA) subreddit on May 3 asking if he and his wife were in the wrong for not wanting to attend a large family gathering for the occasion. 

A Reddit user posted on the social media site asking if he and his wife were in the wrong for not wanting to spend Mother's Day with their extended family after welcoming their first baby.  (iStock)

"My wife and I come from a Hispanic household, where apparently every festivity needs to be spent [with] family," he explained. 

When he and his wife decided not to attend the large gathering, the family did not take the decision well, he said.

REDDIT USERS CONSOLE ‘FRUSTRATED’ MOM WHO LEAVES BABIES CRYING ALONE WHILE SHE GETS 'FRESH AIR'

"The idea wasn’t well received from our mothers… they tried to make us feel guilty about it," he said. 

The Redditor said that traditions are important to their heritage – and that he and his wife they were criticized for not wanting to attend the annual celebration.  (iStock)

The user asked the Reddit community if he and his wife were being rude for making this decision. 

A majority of the Redditors in that community said he and his wife were not in the wrong — and that the new mother should get to spend the day however she wants as it is, after all, her day, too.

"Do whatever your wife wishes to do on that day," one user wrote. 

REDDIT USER EMPTIES DAUGHTER'S COLLEGE FUND TO HOLD ONTO MALIBU DREAM HOUSE — TEEN IS ‘FURIOUS’

Another user said the same scenario happened with his or her mother-in-law ­— advising the couple to look out for their own family.

With a new baby in the house, the couple feels as though they want to make their own traditions and spend the day just the three of them.  (iStock)

"Your parents don’t get to control you for every holiday… spend time with your significant other and kid," the Redditor wrote. 

Amy Morin, a Florida-based licensed psychotherapist and the editor-in-chief of Verywell Mind, said that just because the wife’s family tried "to make her feel guilty, doesn’t mean she is doing anything wrong."

Morin told Fox News Digital by email, "A new mom has a right to honor her wishes, and she can set boundaries with people around her," she said. 

CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP FOR OUR LIFESTYLE NEWSLETTER

The mother in this particular situation is probably focusing on her new child – and realizing that her role has now expanded, she added.

Experts weighed in on the issue and said that the mother should take the time she needs, even if that means not seeing her family on the holiday.  (iStock)

Clinical psychologist Dr. Jayme Albin told Fox News Digital that the family should support the new mom in this stage of her life. 

"The extended family should be flexible and adaptive as the family grows, and recognize that each nuclear family needs time to bond and have their own traditions," she said. 

The New-York based professional noted that although there may be family tradition surrounding spending every holiday together, times have changed. 

"Oftentimes, cultures or families have traditions that developed because they were once adaptive and helpful, but are no longer significant in the way people live their lives presently," she said.